Standing Backwards on a Steep Incline

And I’m too tired to keep going, but can’t rest now because I’ll tumble into the abyss. Ya know what I’m saying? When I was little, one of the most marvelous things I could buy with my allowance, second only to sea monkeys (which I still think were a farce) were these incredible little sponge figures that would expand to nearly four times their original size when you added water to them. After that, they were pretty much useless. They got soggy, and kind of boring. The real thrill was watching them grow, and seeing just how far they could… View Post

helloo? is anyone there? because on saturday night when i’m home alone, it’s just so hard to be sure… but this is an exercise that i need to perfect, isn’t it? and then i either graduate to the perfect blend of domestic/hedonistic bliss with fat babies and smiling dogs in tow, or gin swilling spinsterhood where pretty pool boys tell me i use great eye cream on a daily basis. expectation will ruin any party, but we do it to each other all the time. you expect that because i am extremely sensual that every opportunity for sexual exploration will… View Post

A Frolicking Good Time

Who doesn’t love to wake up to a vigorous game of chase? 6:30 am today felt like a jolly old British farce. I was mostly asleep, and certainly alone, and Toulouse (my lover boy of the four-legged black cat variety) was curled up next to me. Toulouse is ten, and has been ten since I’ve known him. When I adopted him, I wanted a cat who knew a thing or two about life. I thought he’d be a little cool and aloof, and that we’d exist happily without getting into each other’s way, but as it turns out he’s affectionate… View Post

My Ficus was Limp and Other Adventures

I realized yesterday I’ve been forgetting to water my plants. After I gave them all a drink, they instantly seemed to perk up. It’s basic, and simple, and somewhat inane to even mention here, but then I started to look at my own perkiness, which has been lagging. I need to start to treat this body like a temple again. Now that the Fortress of Solitude is fully functional, I have no excuses. I think I’ve got to return to my former, impeccably healthy eating habits, and start to cook. I’ve missed cooking. Nothing else zens me out or gets… View Post

Something is Very Wrong

The only things in the Fortress of Solitude that run on double A batteries are the remote controls for my electronic devices. It’s time to take action people.