Letting Go and Coming Back

The sky was pale pink over the lake this morning. I padded upstairs quietly into the cool air of the cottage, greeted by the smell of coffee and beautiful Lena in silhouette in her room. The best kinds of pjs are the ones that double as yoga wear. You can roll out of bed, ready to do something good for your body. Nancy, who is my personal embodiment of how I’d like to age (striking, fit, bohemian), ushered us to the coffee she’d brewed. We three curled up on the couch and quietly commented on our quality sleep while sipping…

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An Autumn Ritual for Release

Release spells are best worked during the waning or dark moon. Tools: A small table centered in a space with enough room around it to walk in a circle An altar cloth of natural fibres A vase of autumn flowers A cup of wine, milk, or water A dish of sea salt or Himalayan salt A dish of water Incense: cinnamon, evergreen, sandalwood 5 white or pure beeswax candles with holders for each Paper Pen Fireproof vessel Matches A compass Lay Your Altar: Lay your altar cloth on your working surface. Arrange your flowers, and offering of wine, milk or…

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My Monster

“How lucky am I to have a monster on my side?” – Amanda Parker My friend, singer/songwriter Amanda Parker wrote a song about creating a monster to protect you from all the things that might hurt you. As I sat on the patio at Oast House listening to Amanda sing, I thought about how we’ve all patched together these monsters. How we’ve taken dead or dying parts of our experience and resurrected them into half-blind, stumbling beasts with gaping mouths, pressed into protective service. The man I love told me that he can feel the truth in people that they…

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The Power of Silence

This part is always the hardest; the radio silence. The twisting, writhing feeling when contact is severed. The waiting and wondering if you’ll reconnect in any kind of meaningful way. To me, there is nothing worse than not knowing where I stand with someone I love. I feel abandoned, in the truest sense of the word, when there is conflict followed by that silence. I think it’s the way some toddlers must feel the first time they are left at daycare, unsure if their parents will ever return.  Sounds dramatic, right?  I’m sampling a dose of my own prescription and…

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The Gift of Change

This story begins nearly two decades ago. Against the backdrop of two close family members succumbing to cancer, my fledgling marriage to a wonderful man succumbed to a number of things. Inexperience, lack of a practical plan, selfishness, impulsive behaviour, fear, pride, stubbornness, poor financial management, lust, and immaturity for starters. When I think back on that time, I can’t remember details. Life back then feels like a dream that slips further away with each moment of waking. I’ve come to equate this feeling with detachment. With trauma. Fast forward to today. If you read my last post, you’ll know…

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