The children were a brilliant distraction from the tangle in my head on Thursday. I’ve shifted in my parenting style. Something terse and sometimes tense has melted away. I asked The Universe to help me, and I decided to see what they could teach me each day, and my patience has expanded exponentially. I find myself eager to spend a quiet hour or two playing with them in their bedroom at the end of the day.
My seven-year-old has been musing lately on an evening we experienced last year. She had a terrible ear ache, and her bio-mummy was suffering from the same plight, and a fever, and so I rolled up my sleeves and jumped in. I channeled my own mom, who in such moments was absolutely brilliant at taking care of us. The night of the onset of the infection was rough. She couldn’t sleep, and was in so much pain she was moaning and clutching her little head. I felt helpless and achy. Her daddy and I sandwiched her between us on the sofa, gave her some children’s Tylenol after a consult with Telehealth (god love Telehealth) and we just snuggled her and stroked her back until she fell asleep. We didn’t sleep much, of course.
The next day included a special sick bed on the sofa, with a little table holding some juice and goldfish crackers and a never-ending stack of her favourite movies. Now she keeps saying “Mama Schnoo, remember when you made me a sick bed?”
I remember my own sick-bed activities. Mindless TV, stacks of books, coloring, writing. I’d like about a week of that right now. Cocoon style warmth and comfort and nothing to worry about. Quiet incubation, which I really think that every creative person deserves from time-to-time. I feel like I’d have so much more to offer everyone if I could just take a little vacuum-sealed time.
Maybe you could make me a reading or movie list? What are your favourite books and movies when you’re feeling not yourself?